When Motherhood Isn’t Joyful

You know, when it comes right down to it, I don’t consider myself a joyful mother.  Sometimes I feel anti-Christian just admitting that I don’t enjoy my children….all the time.  Am I the only one who has days when motherhood isn’t joyful?

It seems to me wherever I go, whomever I talk to, whatever I read, someone is proclaiming that we’re supposed to constantly enjoy our children…or at least enjoy this journey of motherhood.

So I feel guilty when I don’t.

What's a mom to do, when motherhood isn't joyful? - Anchored In His Grace #motherhood

In all honesty, I never wanted to have children in the first place.  The primary reason why I did start having children, was because I knew I’d regret it later in life.  So, when my husband and I had been married for four years, we were in a good place financially; I was young, and it just seemed logical to go ahead and start having children.

I didn’t have children because of an undying desire to be a mother; I never wanted to be one.

I think this may be one of the reasons why I struggled so much to love my first baby.  Motherhood, just didn’t come naturally like it does with so many other women.  (You can read how I overcame that experience here, Developing A Mother’s Heart.)

So it doesn’t surprise me when I have days that I just don’t enjoy motherhood, or my children.

You know the days…

…when my home feel less like a home, and more like a prison…

…when I have several children pulling on my legs, while trying to keep supper from burning, and someone is crying in the background…

…when my morning begins with children bickering…

Am I doing something wrong to be missing out on all this joy all those other mothers out there are experiencing?

Is something wrong with me, since I don’t constantly enjoy my children?

Will my children be scarred for life, because they have a damaged mother?

What’s a mother to do, when motherhood isn’t joyful?

Remember that my joy isn’t wrapped up in the circumstances of my day, or the decisions of my children.

“…do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.”  Nehemiah 8:10

Pray.  Pray for the Lord’s perspective on who I am in him, and what he has for me to accomplish for the day.

Seek Christ in the moment.  Did I mention pray?  That’s part of seeking Christ.

Call a friend, and keep it real.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been “spurred toward love & good deeds” simply because I openly shared with a trusted Godly friend.

“And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.  Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another–and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”  Hebrews 10:24-25

Sit on the couch, snuggle a child, and read a book.

Look through pictures of the children.

Give thanks.  Verbally say a few things you’re thankful for, and maybe even write them down.

“…give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”  1 Thessalonians 5:18

You know, lacking joy in motherhood doesn’t mean I’m an unfit mother; sometimes it just means I’m normal.

Let your joy be in the Lord today, even though you’re not enjoying the moment.  {⇐Tweet that!}

Experiencing God's grace everyday - Anchored In His Grace

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